Simple Indifference
From what you could observe, a case of "late Me" raises up a more severe case of "late Me" to start with. Okay, what is to come will not be too sweet, but it will somehow try to highlight some of the reasons why we are who we are now, why the kids aren't all that right. Why we are mostly selfish, and if we remain so we will certainly not be anything else.
A grown up "Me" in general finds the whole marriage and kids thing as a "burden I was not ready to take". So more moderate cases than the cases we've seen before just bury themselves in their work (I mean men here) and kind of disregard raising up the kids, or to put it in a more accurate way, they just don't give it enough time. Raising up kids is a job on it's own, and it takes dedication and a lot of effort, it's not just about bringing money back home and “There you go, I’ve done my part'.
What made him act like that in the first place is some lack in the ability to sacrifice the peace of mind he gets on the time out of work. Some people will tell me now, "Hey, the man has the right to chill". Now I’ll tell them, "What about the woman? Do you think she can do the job all on her own? Do you even think that she will be able to do it right under the pressure of working alone? And she has the right to chill too then, right? She would become too frustrated that way. Single mothers mainly are too nervous, simply because of the pressure they feel trying to raise humans on their own, which is not an easy task... not at all..
We talked now about the case where a father is at work all the time, not giving up much spirit for Hamada, and Hamada at the same time is alone most of the time with his mother, who cannot just stay face to face with Hamada 24/7, so she leaves him for the street to raise him up, and she is strict. She yells at Hamada as much as she could, actually the only conversation between herself and Hamada is yelling. "COME UP IT’S DINNER TIME!" or "ENOUGH PLAY, COME UP!" Maybe another “WHO ARE THOSE KIDS YOU’RE HANGING AROUND WITH?" at a later stage.
And the father has not grown the sophisticated sense of raising up simply because he has not tried, so the only interaction between him and Hamada is simply "SHOW ME YOUR EXAM RESEULTS!", "Here’s your birthday present", "Here’s your high school graduation present", "You have to major in engineering", "Why are you always failing? It’s all down to your mother!", "Marry him!" etc.
A family is supposed to be a team. Hamada did not grow up in a team, instead he has no "belonging" to his home, the only thing he understands from the principle "mother" to "father" is that "Father brings money and can be nasty when he gets angry" and "Mother is what sticks to one's neck and punishes as he does wrong" So, what kind of principles is this? Let’s put in a good question here: What is Hamada now? He is a "Me" of course, a simple street-raised "Me", he hasn't seen a proper compilation of a "WE" personality, so he simply has no idea how to grow into one.
That kind of "me" is indifferent, he cares less, his parents raised him up out of the "machine" concept, "We feed you and give you a proper life because this is out duty", not with much spirit, not with a goal to bring up the best in him. Hamada now is still somehow lost, because he didn't yet have the opportunity to understand what he wants from life, he just understands that he likes to gain, and enjoy. Anything else is not to be considered. So he gets married, and falls into the same cycle as his father's. But this time he is an "indifferent", more severe that his daddy, as his daddy was "indifferent", but at least he got raised up in times where a man HAD to know what he wants from life, because life was not as simple as it is now…
A grown up "Me" in general finds the whole marriage and kids thing as a "burden I was not ready to take". So more moderate cases than the cases we've seen before just bury themselves in their work (I mean men here) and kind of disregard raising up the kids, or to put it in a more accurate way, they just don't give it enough time. Raising up kids is a job on it's own, and it takes dedication and a lot of effort, it's not just about bringing money back home and “There you go, I’ve done my part'.
What made him act like that in the first place is some lack in the ability to sacrifice the peace of mind he gets on the time out of work. Some people will tell me now, "Hey, the man has the right to chill". Now I’ll tell them, "What about the woman? Do you think she can do the job all on her own? Do you even think that she will be able to do it right under the pressure of working alone? And she has the right to chill too then, right? She would become too frustrated that way. Single mothers mainly are too nervous, simply because of the pressure they feel trying to raise humans on their own, which is not an easy task... not at all..
We talked now about the case where a father is at work all the time, not giving up much spirit for Hamada, and Hamada at the same time is alone most of the time with his mother, who cannot just stay face to face with Hamada 24/7, so she leaves him for the street to raise him up, and she is strict. She yells at Hamada as much as she could, actually the only conversation between herself and Hamada is yelling. "COME UP IT’S DINNER TIME!" or "ENOUGH PLAY, COME UP!" Maybe another “WHO ARE THOSE KIDS YOU’RE HANGING AROUND WITH?" at a later stage.
And the father has not grown the sophisticated sense of raising up simply because he has not tried, so the only interaction between him and Hamada is simply "SHOW ME YOUR EXAM RESEULTS!", "Here’s your birthday present", "Here’s your high school graduation present", "You have to major in engineering", "Why are you always failing? It’s all down to your mother!", "Marry him!" etc.
A family is supposed to be a team. Hamada did not grow up in a team, instead he has no "belonging" to his home, the only thing he understands from the principle "mother" to "father" is that "Father brings money and can be nasty when he gets angry" and "Mother is what sticks to one's neck and punishes as he does wrong" So, what kind of principles is this? Let’s put in a good question here: What is Hamada now? He is a "Me" of course, a simple street-raised "Me", he hasn't seen a proper compilation of a "WE" personality, so he simply has no idea how to grow into one.
That kind of "me" is indifferent, he cares less, his parents raised him up out of the "machine" concept, "We feed you and give you a proper life because this is out duty", not with much spirit, not with a goal to bring up the best in him. Hamada now is still somehow lost, because he didn't yet have the opportunity to understand what he wants from life, he just understands that he likes to gain, and enjoy. Anything else is not to be considered. So he gets married, and falls into the same cycle as his father's. But this time he is an "indifferent", more severe that his daddy, as his daddy was "indifferent", but at least he got raised up in times where a man HAD to know what he wants from life, because life was not as simple as it is now…
posted by Gold at 5:09 PM
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